Sunday, August 1, 2010


Today, I'd like to talk about verbs.  The person who typed in Global Watch has a hard time using the right tense, and the right verb.  For instance, read this action-packed, fast paced section.

I'm confused by how the person who typed in Global Watch describes Kyp's fighting style. First, he "launches" his attacker across the room, and then stands up.  Then, after he says, "Are you so sure about that?" he is sitting again.  The person who typed in Global Watch should learn how to use the past perfect tense. So, the sentence should read "Glancing at the monitor where Kyp had been sitting,..."  Jiminy Christmas is it that hard?  
I'm also unclear on how Laura "launched across the room."  Does she have a rocket pack?  Springs on the soles of her shoes?  I imagine that after Kyp launched her, launching herself would be hell on the knees.  Simply put, person who typed in Global Watch, you have to paint a picture for us.  
Another question I have concerns the phrase "and the battle began."  I'm no combat veteran, but I'm pretty sure that when a battle begins, both sides don't continue to talk to each other.  But that's exactly what happens here.  Kyp and Laura do some launching, then, the person who typed in Global Watch tells us, the battle begins with Laura telling Kyp he can't win, and Kyp asking if she's sure.  That is almost the wussiest battle I've ever seen.  I think it is only beat by this one schoolyard "fight" I saw where two classmates circled each other calling each other names and saying how bad they were going to wail on each other.  Then the recess bell rang and we had to go inside.  I was in third grade when this happened.  Did Global Watch get his ideas about battles from eight year olds?  
Of course, Kyp and Laura do actually physically fight (in a section I have mercifully not reprinted here), but even there, the person who typed in Global Watch wants us to believe they keep having a conversation as they trade blows.  What the hell is wrong with this person?  

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